Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The Armpit Saga

Well, I'm back to the doctor today. Yep, you guessed it - the "alleged" infected hair in my armpit has not gone away. So now I get to see a surgeon about removing the hair. Have you ever in your life heard of so much hoopla over a darned hair?????

Anyway, I'm pretty sure I could have avoided this entire situation if I'd just lost weight. Why, you ask. Well, because my regular GP is always pushing weight loss. Not that I disagree, mind you, I DO need to lose some weight. But if you listened to him, weight loss would solve everything like stress, joint pain, gerd, and global warming. In fact, I'm fairly certain that the Cowboys would have beat the Patriots on Sunday if I had only dropped a few pounds before the game.

I keep hoping (in the far, far reaches of my fantasy mind) that the surgeon is just going to say "well, hell let me just take that out with a razor and a pair of tweezers and we'll be done with it." Quite frankly, if I had the means to biopsy the removed tissue, I would have seriously considered doing this myself. The oncologist charged a $577 office fee for the five minutes he spent with me to tell me he wasn't impressed. God only knows what a surgeon will charge to actually remove a single hair. Thank God for insurance.

I'll check in tomorrow and let you know if I have to schedule major surgery for a hair or if I managed to convince him on that razor/tweezers thing.


Jaye Wells said...

I'm sorry to laugh at your pain, but LOL. Alaso, wtf is gerd?

Wendy Roberts said...

Yanno, I'm pretty darn sure that if you let me near you with a razor and tweezers I could totally do this for you and I'd only charge you a bottle of tequila. If it's a deep hair, 2 bottles.

Btw, saw Rumble right at the front checkouts of Zellers yesterday. Zellers is kinda like a Canuk version of Target. Anyway, I think they've got it there as advance promo for UnLucky. I was so excited I had to buy 2 more copies LOL!

Jana DeLeon said...

Laugh away, Jaye! The situation is really ridiculous. GERD stands for gastro-esophagul reflux disease. (please excuse my spelling on that one) Basically, it's horrible heartburn and acid reflux caused by an ulcer.

Wendy that is WAY COOL!!!!! And front of store is the COOLEST!!!! I can't believe people are re-ordering RUMBLE. How exciting is that???? And thanks for buying more copies, but ummmm what exactly are you going to do with them????

Tori Lennox said...

I'm sorry but LOL! Who'd have guessed a hair could cause so much hassle?

Jana DeLeon said...

Hi tori - I had no idea, that's for sure. But I am painfully (and financially) aware of it now.

Holli B. said...

Holy Cow, Jana! Surgery to remove a single hair??
I'm thinking there's a story in there somewhere.
I'll be sending positive thoughts your way and keep us updated.
LOL on weight loss being the fix for global warming. Can I get carbon credits for each pound lost?

Wendy Roberts said...

Jana, my additional copies of Rumble will be a give-away at my humor workshop this weekend. The lucky suckers LOL :)

Jana DeLeon said...

LOL Holli - I want carbon credits too! And thanks for the positive thoughts!

Cool Wendy! Thanks so much for spreading a bit of me around Canada. :)

An Austin DesignWorks Production